Once all the good stuff is bought, and the hair and makeup are done, how do you get to a super-secret boudoir shoot and still surprise your husband? I made a "coffee date" with my friend - who is also an AWESOME senior and family photographer - Brianna Saban. She's the mastermind and hard work behind BriannaSaban.com. The hubby knows that a girls' coffee date always takes HOURS, so it was the perfect alibi. Now to get a giant bag of frothy lingerie out of the house without getting noticed ...

courtesy of Briana Saban High-heels in hand, I arrived ready to bare all ... well ... sort of ready. I pulled out all of my goodies and started taking tags off my never-been-worn wares. I started with the corset, classic and covered. The right photographer - and in this case, the right friend - is not shy. Bri gave me red lipstick and told me to tart it up a bit, complimented me on my "great pair" and we were off.

By outfit number two, I was in the swing of it. The corset gave way to a nightie, the nightie to the lacy bra and panty set, and the lacy set lead to a white sheet. I was more than confident in Bri's vision for making awesome pictures, and I was even willing to take direction. I only asked about her camera settings and lenses once...ok, probably twice.

courtesy of Briana Saban

Here's what I learned:

We all get nervous and self-conscious, and that's okay. As a photographer, I sympathize with your nerves, but I already know how awesome you are going to look. My job is to make you comfortable and help you tap into your sexy side. On the other side of the camera, it was hard for me to step out of my self-critical mindset and just BE the sexy woman my husband sees when he looks at me, but you know what? She was in there! And she's inside you, too. 

Listen to your photographer. I know, that sounds self-serving because I AM the photographer, but it's true. She can see all the things you can't when you are standing against a wall in heels pushing your boobs out while trying to pull in all the things you don't want anyone to see.

Relax your face. This is supposed to be fun, and it is. Imagine your partner doing whatever crazy things he does to make you laugh, or the sweet things he does to make you happy. Think steamy thoughts and silly thoughts. LAUGHTER IS SEXY!

Love yourself. I left my session feeling like a million bucks! If I'd planned better, there would have been a date night to follow so my husband could have been benefited from all that confidence. When I finally got to SEE my pictures, I felt like a BILLION bucks. Who knew I looked like that?! Well, besides the Mr. who said "That's how you ALWAYS look to me!"

courtesy of Briana Saban

I encourage EVERYONE to find their inner-sexy. Whether it's a day at the spa, a lingerie shopping trip or a photo shoot, DO IT. Sure, your partner will get a kick out of the results, but the changes it can make in the way you see YOURSELF are truly priceless.